After living out my secret Nashville fantasy by writing and recording an original song, I got bit by the performance bug a bit. Not hard enough to keep up with my guitar lessons or sing in front a live audience without any recording effects to hide behind, but enough to keep writing until I came up with something that I felt comfortable enough to share in front of real actual people. This is that piece. What began as a lighthearted conversation with some girlfriends over lunch grew into an actual poem during my solo trip to the Rocky Mountains and has since evolved into what I like to call my "womanifesto." Here's the video of the live read, with the full text of the poem below. Hear me roar!


I’ve got big balls.
At least, that’s what I’m told
When I do anything brave, or exciting, or bold

Like have an idea that I’m willing to fight for
Pursue a career I know that I’m right for
Or make a big move without anyone’s blessing
Pull off a win without crying and stressing
Or come to the table with all that I’ve learned
To ask for the time, and money and respect that I’ve earned

Anytime I face a challenge without any savior
Somebody wants to chalk up my behavior to….balls

And it’s a compliment, I know.
And it doesn’t literally mean that little sac where sperm grow
It’s just a figure of speech, the meaning’s changed and grown
But here’s the thing -
Balls are something that women can never truly own.

To call a brave woman “ballsy” makes her an exception
An oddity
A curiosity
A rare and unnatural specimen
And it keeps all the other women right where they belong
Kinder. Gentler. We don’t need to be strong, we just want to get along :) 
Keep everything copacetic.
Keep smiling.
Keep nodding.
Keep being sympathetic.
Don’t put anyone’s beliefs or biases to the test.
Just keep unruffling all those feathers, that’s what women should do best.
Except...those who were blessed

But that’s pretty much NONE.
So I say, let the day of the ballsy woman be done.

Let today be the dawn of a better word.
Let’s remove bold, gutsy women from the realm of the absurd.
Because fierce and fearless females are NOT outside of the norm.
We deserve a word that fits OUR form.

And I say that word is…TITS.

Think about it.
Those orbs of endless fascination
And adoration
And denigration
The world’s already obsessed with them
We just have to change the conversation

We’ve spent our whole lives staring and comparing
Dressing up and pressing in and stressing out over the state of our tits.

Their shape
Their size
How they feel in the hand
How they look to the eyes
It’s no surprise
We wanna cut ourselves open
Shove some magic inside
Pump ourselves up
400ccs of pride! (maybe 500)

But today, let’s set that all aside.

Let’s help tits transcend the tissue of the breast
And stand in for the issue of woman at her best
For our audacity, and our tenacity, a whole new sacred totem
Just like balls broke free from the walls of the scrotum!

Let’s give a whole new meaning to “That girl’s got great tits!”
It’s not about cup size, or nipple rise, or how high they sit
It’s about striving and thriving through wit and through grit

It’s about choosing to use - not defuse - our powers
And claiming the strength that has always been ours

Because we’ve got steel of our own
We don’t need it on loan
So once and for all,
Let the men have their balls
Let’s stop co-opting that label.
It just never fits.

Women of the world: show me your tits!